When Maternity Leave Ends and Real Life Begins
My baby just completed her 3rd month and stepped into the 4th. Along with that milestone, my maternity leave came to an end — and reality hit hard.
Because of work pressure and ongoing issues with my in-laws, I couldn’t continue the breastfeeding routine I had initially planned. I had tried everything — the breast pump, nipple shields, even nipple pullers — hoping to give her my milk. But when those efforts didn’t work out, I continued with formula milk. It wasn’t an easy decision. I carried a heavy heart, thinking I had failed her in some way. But slowly, I started accepting the situation for what it was.
At first, I thought formula feeding would be temporary — maybe just a week or so until I could try again. But life had other plans. Between work and emotional stress, I had no time to follow through with breast pumping or nursing routines.
Why I Let Go of the Breastfeeding Plan
It was painful. Seeing her cry with constipation made me realize the value of breast milk even more. I bought an electric pump, hoping to offer some balance. For a short while, I did manage alternate feeds — one with expressed breast milk, and one with formula. But once I returned home with just my husband and baby, I had to go fully formula again. Even though it wasn’t ideal, it was what worked for us.
Learning to Bathe My Baby (And Gaining Confidence!)
One thing I’m proud of during this phase is learning to bathe my daughter. Honestly, I was scared at first — like many new moms are. I thought I’d never get it right.
But here’s what helped me:
I used a baby bathtub and sometimes held her on my legs when needed.
I applied body wash gently, avoiding any harsh rubbing, especially on her face.
After the first few days, I gained confidence and my fear disappeared.
By the end of the first week, I was bathing her like a pro. I still wonder how I picked it up so fast. After the 3rd month, I started using mild soap and a little nalangu maavu (herbal bath powder). She seemed to enjoy it, and I felt more connected through this simple daily ritual.
Dear new moms — please don’t hesitate to bathe your baby. You’ll get the hang of it, and soon it’ll become your favorite bonding time.
A New Routine: Work, Baby, and Finding My Flow
From the 4th month onward, it was just the three of us — me, my husband, and our daughter. My husband leaves for work at 8:00 AM and comes home around 8:30 or 9:00 PM, so I handled everything else alone.
Here’s how I managed:
I used two silver feeding bottles, giving her formula every 4 hours.
Each morning, I stored hot water in a flask to make bottles easier to prepare.
I cooked breakfast and lunch early in the day to stay ahead of schedule.
I hired a maid to help with dishwashing.
Managing the Mess and Letting Go of Perfection
Even with all the planning, the house was always messy. I simply didn’t have time for organization hacks or Pinterest-worthy cleaning routines. After dinner, we just made sure the floor was cleared and gave it a quick mop. That’s it.
Some days were smooth. Others were messy — emotionally and physically. But every day, I showed up.
Dear Moms: You’re Stronger Than You Think
If you’re in the thick of this season — adjusting to post-maternity life, battling guilt about feeding, or struggling with time — please hear this:
You are not alone.
It’s okay if your house is not spotless.
It’s okay if your feeding plan didn’t go the way you imagined.
It’s okay if you’re figuring things out day by day.
Your baby doesn’t need perfection. She needs you — present, loving, and doing your best. And that’s exactly what you’re already doing.
